It seems so hard to believe that it's been only 6 or so months ago (assuming of course that I keep the site updated!) since Julan has come into our lives. I realized in re-doing the website that we talked about our family, and our adoption story – even included a daily update of our trip to China in June of 2004. But we never really have updated anyone about just what life has been like since we've been home.
It's been a whirlwind of activity since our return with Julan. While Jolene and I are experienced parents, with 3 boys prior to adopting Julan, we are in uncharted territory now. Our boys absolutely love Julan, and she returns the sentiment. We've had virtually none of the "how much did she cost?" or "does she know she's not your real daughter?" type of comments from friends or family. It just seems like she's always been a part.
When Julan first arrived home in July of 2004, the worst that can be said of the experience was her skin condition. Her poor face and skin! We went to our doctor for her initial baby checkup, and he said, "Hmmm, better have that checked out by a specialist. That'll be $150 please." The specialist said, "Hmmm, not sure what that rash is. Here's a prescription. That'll be $100 please." The pharmacist said, "Here's the medication, that'll be $180 please." So after nearly $500 we learned that Julan has a rash. Hmmm. It eventually cleared up on it's own, either sun poisoning, or as some have later told us, it's just the Chinese form of eczema.
Although we have heard of some of the other girls from our travel group having trouble eating, this is certainly not one of Julan's problems. She was in love with French fries within our first day in China, and fries continue to be the bribe of choice from uncles trying to get on her good side. She's still so small, but she is gaining weight and growing.
When we first got her, she seemed so infant-like - the way her head bobbed around, with very little muscle tone. But she was crawling around before we left China. Now, just about six months later, she is walking, running, climbing the stairs... Makes you wonder if all these motor skills are a blessing or a curse.
Julan was about 15 months when we received her, so speech was not really an issue (her speaking any, or us trying to understand baby Chinese.) One thing that has been an incredible Godsend to us is sign language. From Jolene's experience working at our church daycare, we have been teaching Julan sign language. From within a few days after we arrived home, Jolene taught her to say "hungry" and "more." This has been so helpful in allievating some of the frustration that Julan surely must have felt. She now has quite a vocabulary in sign language, including "drink, cookie, cracker, please, thank you, up, no, cold, hot, baby, momma, daddy, sick, I love you, and Jesus." I have to admit, I also taught her to hold up her fingers in the shape of an L on her forehead for "loser."
She is now becoming vocal, saying "Momma, daddy, Talon (one of her brothers - actually she calls all the brothers "Tahwan", which he finds funny and the other two absolutely hate!) up, hot, please, Ooowwww (when she bonks her head) and always greets us from naptime with a big "Helllwhoa!" Developmentally I don't know where she is as opposed to where she's "supposed to be," but I figure I can't understand my teenage son most of the time, so she's doing fine.
One thing that friends and family find amusing/frustrating is Julan's fickle attitude about who she'll let hold her and when. As mentioned before, many have tried the french fry trick to win her affections, but she's becoming saavy to that one. She'll go to anyone in the immediate family with no problem. She'll go without question to her Uncle Mark, but not his wife, and not any of the other uncles, but to most of her cousins, but not all. I'm sure there are all sorts of reasons in her head from "I like men's facial hear" all the way to "Hey, the last time SHE held me, mom and dad took off and she babysat me... Let GO OF ME!!!" Generally, the crying show she puts on when we hand her off to someone is usually just that, a show.
So for now, Julan is just what any nearly two year old toddler is - adorable, frustrating, full of wonder, an incredible mimic, into everything (remote controls are her favorite) she whines, she laughs, she fights taking naps then wakes up with bed head. It's bizarre to have a child with no history - everytime we look at her we try to imagine just what the future has in store for her. But I guess that just makes her... our daughter.
Sorry 'bout that. Right now we're just enjoying our time together. Jolene was cleaning out Julan's closet the other day and called out from the other room, "I'm gonna pass these clothes along unless you think we might do this again someday!" It was uncomfortably silent for a moment as I let that sink in. Who knows, maybe someday, before I get too old.
